Keeping Your Board or Organization Strong by Effectively Managing Conflict
Guest Blogger, Randy Richards, Ph.D., Emeritus Professor of Management, St. Ambrose University
“Conflict occurs when a person becomes aware that the other party has done or is going to do something that threatens what they care about. ”
Managing conflicts successfully means helping each party gets their concerns addressed. Increasing your effectiveness in conflict management requires attention to both the conflict issue (what each party cares about) and the effect on the relationship during the conflict process.
First, you need to gain clarity about the conflict issue between the two parties. You need to recognize that conflict occurs when what people care about is threaten. So, begin by reflecting on what specifically you care about in this conflict. This is not always obvious, and the more specific you are about this the better. You will also need to ask questions and gain a clear understanding of what your conflict dance partner cares about. As before, this may not be obvious, and the more specific the better. In the conversation about the conflict issues, it works better if you ask questions about what the other person cares about. After that has become clear, when you share your concerns, they are likely to be less defensive. Once both parties are clear about what the other person cares about, then the conversation can turn to generating different options and how an integrative (both/and) solution might be possible.
Second, during the conflict conversation, you also need to pay attention to how the conversation is affecting the relationship. Obviously, name-calling and blaming are not helpful, regardless of how much you might be tempted to do so. Instead, you need to engage in a strategy of demonstrating respect for them as a person and an appreciation for what they care about. If you begin, as we suggested above, with asking them questions about their concerns and exploring their perspective before offering your own, then you will have a positive effect on the relationship.
If you can gain clarity on the conflict issue and demonstrate a positive regard for the relationship during the process, you will find that you increase your chances of a successful outcome.
Please send questions or comments to RandyRichards49@gmail.com
Randy Richards, Ph.D., a second career academic, spent almost 20 years in management in both the public and the private sector before becoming a full-time professor at St. Ambrose University.
Randy currently serves as Professor Emeritus at St. Ambrose as well as a contributing faculty member at the Zagreb School of Economics and Management in Zagreb, Croatia and Visiting Professor at Kaiserslautern Technical University in Kaiserslautern, Germany, the International Management School in Vilnius, Lithuania, and the Berlin Potsdam School of Business in Berlin and Hamburg Germany. He also works part-time for Kirkwood Community College’s Corporate Training Center.
An experienced facilitator and highly skilled workshop designer for adult learners, Randy has an active consulting and coaching practice. Over the course of his forty plus year career, Randy estimates he has taught more than 10,000 people across all of his courses and workshops.
